I thought I may follow up from one of my previous posts regarding my son and the many issues we have faced with him over the past little while.
My son has needed quite a bit of advocating on his behalf the past few months with teachers, bus drivers, school aides, coaches, friends and generally anyone who comes in contact with him on a daily basis. And typically that role falls on my shoulders.
Not because I am the only one that can do it, not because my husband doesn't want to do it, but mainly because I am the one who is home 24/7 unfortunately. My hubby works hard for our family, but typically away from home. And while that means I have to run the ship while he is gone, I know he hears my struggles and feels my anxiety on the phone when I call him in tears to give him a daily account of how things got out of control or blew up in my face. Sometimes I just need to tell another adult about my day and sometimes I need to hear my husband's voice that everything will be ok. But sometimes I do feel bad retelling him things since I know he feels so much pain about not being here and able to help as much as he can when he is home.
My son has had his medication changed and monitored for many months only for us to find a bunch of dead-ends and essentially going back to his first choice of medication, but giving him a larger dose. He slowly adjusted. And as I advocated for him, quite loudly on many occasions, his school switched his Grade 7 class and put him with a different teacher for the remainder of his school year starting January 2018. After only a few weeks, my son returned! He settled in nicely, his demeanour calmed, he actually brought home 2 quizzes that were extremely high in marks! One test was 100% and one was 97%! My son has NEVER gotten about a 70% ever in the entire time he has gone to school and with one short change in a teacher, he is listening, engaging and absorbing tasks and information! I was ecstatic!
Fast forward a few months, and my son continues to have issues with his bus driver. Instances have even escalated to one day where the driver physically holding my son and pushing him off the bus and refusing to bring him home one afternoon. This entire personality conflict issue between my son and the driver I don't see being resolved unless the driver either quits our route or I drive my son into town myself and pick him up after school. The latter will never happen as I don't have that kind of flexibility. I have tried every avenue I can think of from talking to the transportation department, the Resource Officer at his school, the Board of Directors for our school division, EVERYONE who may have any say in my son's ability to get to and from school each day. Each time I talk to someone I am told the same thing over and over, My son is BAD. He is DIFFICULT, the driver has every right to refuse him if he poses a threat/disturbance/etc. I have tried giving them SEVERAL resolutions to help work with them when it comes to my son and yet, it falls on deaf ears. I am at the end of my rope and still struggle with how we will proceed when September rolls around.
My son has had an updated Educational Assessment completed since last November. We are in the process of receiving it, and should have it by the end of this month. It was an exhausting process in itself with many bumps and issues along the way, but essentially we are told my son is 3 academic years behind his peer group, displays signs/symptoms of Autism/Asperger's syndrome, as well as 'Global Learning Disabilities' - whatever that means. We are waiting for the full report with complete details. While it is heartbreaking to hear the struggles my son has, it is a bit of a relief to hear that there are solid reasons WHY he has problems. And with a proper diagnosis/referral we can get him the tools he needs to overcome his obstacles now and in the future.
We did receive wonderful news near the end of the school year. I petitioned my son's Grade 7 teacher to think about teaching Grade 8 in the fall and taking my son with him. I bribed him with Banana Bread and Meatloaf. 2 months later, I received a letter from the school stating that his Grade 7 teacher has decided to move up to Grade 8 and 'loop' his entire class! He is taking all his students with him to Grade 8! After our Parent-Teacher meeting at the end of the year, his teacher did say he had a few reasons for wanting to continue with the group of kids he had, but taking Maddox with him was one of them. I am so very thankful and blessed that God has given us a fabulous teacher for my son for one more year! I know this teacher cannot take him every year, but for the time being, we are glad we don't have to worry about this fall!
I do not know what the future will hold for my son as he grows and matures. I sometimes am overcome with anxiety and grief when I think about how hard everything will be for him some days. And some days I forget and just enjoy his company. I try to just take it one day at a time. Keep On, Keeping On.....